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/fic/ Archival Macil!/5s/Techmk ## Admin 7386Sticky[View]

We've decided that this board's current activity can be better served by our other boards. This board isn't sustaining much activity of its own or functioning as a living resource. This board is going to be removed from the main board list in a few days and go into read-only mode.


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!!Bloom ## Mod 6826StickyLocked[View]

Rules and Etiquette

Welcome to /fic/, the board for pony fanfiction and all things related to it! If you have any questions or just want to chat, feel free to drop by the #fic IRC.


  1. Threads and posts should pertain to written fiction.
  2. Threads should not be redundant.
    • For example, don’t make a new thread for requesting a review (which could be posted in a review thread, see >>6827) or recommending/requesting a story (which could be posted in the Recommendation/Request General, >>0079).
  3. If you request a review of the same story from multiple people, let each of them know you have done so.

Note: All site-wide rules still apply.


  • Be polite. “You’re an idiot. Twilight Sparkle would never hurt Spike,” can be revised to, “Twilight Sparkle would never hurt Spike.”
  • Before posting, think about whether or not what you’re about to say really adds anything to the conversation.
  • Stories are customarily accompanied by a title, a description, tags, and a link to the story in question (where applicable).
  • If someone thinks your story isn’t great, they might let you know. That might hurt your feelings, but that’s a risk you take when you open your work to feedback. Part of learning to write well is learning to take criticism.
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Anonymous 7332[View]

Let's figure out how do we fix Chrysalis and the whole changeling concept.
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Anonymous 7349

Anonymous 7384

Make them more like nature fairies as opposed to insects.
They work well as secret agents, but the love thing still doesn't much sense.

The Person Who Posts As Fluttershy (Element of Self-descriptive Usernames) 7390

It could be if they can forcibly feed off of love for another. Once the kingdom is conquered then you could harvest the ponies love for each other.

It doesn't matter though since it seems unlikely they would need to invade either way. Under either scenario they should be able to set down in a specific region and keep feeding off the locals forever. Migration would be an unnecessary and risky endeavor.

The invasion only makes sense if feeding off love is not sustainable. In that case the hive would be under pressure not only to find new sources of love but to do so quickly.

A direct attack may be necessary because infiltration of such a large group would need to be done slowly to avoid suspicion. With a group like Chrysalis's by the time everyone was set up you'd be facing starvation.

Perhaps small bands of changelings attack by infiltration and reproduce to form larger bands. In growing the group becomes more difficult to conceal and has more difficulty infiltrating new societies. This means that a successful band must go after larger societies(easier to bend into) and eventually resort to force.

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Why do you write? soundslikeponies!bQsJPGMNfw 5398[View]

Simple question. How you got into writing, what you hope to achieve doing it, what aspect of it you like most… What drives you, /fic/?
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Smokeydapon3!L9hT7oDU1E 7353

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ive always loved writing, hopefully one day i can write a book, not necessarily to get published, writing really relaxes the mind.

im just lurking around, i usually avoid fanfiction

Ghosties 7383

*shrugs* I dunno, I got into poetry when I was a kid in middle school and from there an interest grew in the written word.

Johnny 7389

I didn't, but here's how: Get a smooth writing style and rich vocabulary, you need a good order/structure and your writing to have transition words and adjectives. Then write rich, but clear descriptions and watch your pacing when it comes to writing action. When writing description you should think as if you were writing a script and had to tell the storyboarder exactly how the scene goes and how much time passes, that sort of stuff.

The achievements of writing… the results are pretty weak if you aren't talented enough to execute ideas properly and it's hard to do that with no visuals and audio. But the actual achievement is that if you find a publisher you will write a comic, cartoon, movie, sitcom in a much refreshing, clever and content-filled way than others. I found spiderman comics to have much more content and good takes than the 90s show. Who knows maybe you'll be the next dumbass to get cash, like Michael Bay, except this time you won't produce a pile of shit.

The aspect and drive… it's like writing your own living breathing world with it's traditions&landmarks, and charming characters with their ambitions and perks. It's the ability of modifying existing content or producing new content by ideas translated into words.
Though the drive and the end result would be much, much more rewarding if you could just imagine,save and edit the visuals&voice acting in a second on your hard drive or movie reel. Most jokes, character emotions and action require visual cues and timing to work effectively, which text doesn't have. Text doesn't have the smoothness of a running visual.

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Anonymous 7377[View]

The sexy antics of the students and staff of Canterlot High are explored here in the Equestria Girls Fingerbang thread. Whether you're interested in the brash captain of the soccer team, the awkward egghead or the busty voluptuous principal, we've got stories, poems, art and other creative works just for you.

New readers, writers, and artists are always welcome.



>Thread archive and our 15 recommended stories:


>Verified tripcodes:


Fingerbang IRC Chat
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Anonymous 7381

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Have you tried starting these threads on /anon/? I'd bet that'd sell like hotcakes.

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The Training Grounds: HNNNNG Edition Anonymous 3448[View][Last 50 Posts]

#Reviewer #Training Grounds

Greetings all, and welcome to the Training Grounds, the review thread for all authors, reviewers, proofreaders, and editors, both newcomer and seasoned veteran alike. It isn't the only such thread, but it's usually the busiest! (Previous edition of The Training Grounds; The sticky, which contains important information)

If you're a reviewer, old or new, and you want feedback on your review, please put a "*" at the front of the subject line of your review post.
Writers: Submission guide | TL/DR of the submission guide | List of TTG regulars | Submission form | List of recently-finished reviews | Reviews in progress
Reviewers: How to review | List of unclaimed requests
Maintainers: The full, current active queue | Statistics and queue-dump text for thread updates | A guide to how it's all organized
Live communication: The IRC channel
Some Notes:
  • Do jump in and participate if you can. New reviewers, editors and authors are always welcome!
  • No one is infallible. If something doesn't seem right, ask about it! Whether it be about a review you've received, a fanfic submitted, or something about the queue spreadsheet, the best way to solve it is through communication.
  • If you think you've been missed: please remind us with a link to
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Filler 7176

At current traffic, that won't be happening for a while.

Queue information 7269

Anyone who posted a story for review here but has not received one, please reply to this post and include your info again (title, tags, word count, link, synopsis) so we know what we have.

Review Request for My Little Poem, by MrAlbum321 7379

Hello, dear /fic community!

My name is Mr. Album, and bear with me as I post this (hopefully) in the training grounds. This is my first time posting on mlpchan, and I am doing my best to follow the submission guidelines as shown in that thread.

With that disclaimer out of the way, let me show you what I am requesting a review for:

Title: My Little Poem.

Tags: Incomplete, Dark, Adventure, Teen, Sex (implied, never described in detail)
Extra tags: Poetry, Writing, First-person perspective, Tragic backstory, Twilicorn, Celestia, Unconventional family, Child, Rape (only in backstory, nothing dirty is ever written out), OC

I could go on with more tags, but I'll leave it at that… if I did the tags right. If someone could tell me how to do them correctly, that would be fantastic.


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Review Request—Arcane Nights, Book 1: Blackthorn Asylum 7378[View]

So, I'm curious, would anyone be willing to share their opinion on this fic I've been working on? I want to try submitting it to Equestria Daily, and I already tried once and edited it to improve it.


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Anonymous 7366[View]

Are there any Carrot Top/Golden Harvest clopfics?
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dolfeus!doseuxbE3s 7371


This man has a valid point. Now I'm curious, too.

Anonymous 7374

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Simply put, people each attach specific personalities to them and then want to fuck said personalities, without even including the possibility fanon has made it so something has been related to a character and thus is their fetish, amongst many other possibilities.

I mean, this exists, why not background pony clopfics?

Anonymous 7376


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Anonymous 7372[View]

Did somebody ever create a series of fics trying to be a superior show based on my little pony which actually lived up to what it was suppose to be?
I'm talking about alternate takes on G1,G2,G3,G4 all of them not just the latest one. You'd think there'd be some fanfiction left from the old fanbase.

dolfeus!doseuxbE3s 7373

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>You'd think there'd be some fanfiction left from the old fanbase.

From what I've seen, the fan-fic community before G4 was somewhere between non-existant and completely irrelevant.

As far as reinventing a past incarnation of the show, it's kind of counter-productive, seeing as fimfic only allows Friendship is Magic-based fan-fics. Sure, you could post it on deviantArt or FF.net, but that's the horsewords ghetto.

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Story Request/Recommendation General 79[View]

#General #Discussion #Collection

Hello and welcome to the Recommendation and Request General of MLPchan's /fic/!

Consider this a thread to drop in a fic you think deserves attention or to request a story.

1.) No self-promotion. Your work should stand for itself and make others want to refer to it.
2.) Provide tags and some small additional information, such as content, for people to know what they are heading into.

1.) Post on this thread promoted works that deserve the attention.
2.) If you see people asking for recommendations, direct them here and ask them to delete their thread.

Places to look for fics:
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Anonymous 7301

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I'm looking for some good Big Mac x Rarity or Big Mac x Luna if that even exists.

Actually hell, I'd just like some good fics about Big Macintosh in general, don't necessarily need to be ships I guess

Anonymous 7370

Are there any stories where everypony becomes immortal?

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Anonymous 7305[View]

What does /fic/ think about CRISIS: Equestria?


I like Red Velvet

Anonymous 7310

I don't like the design of those OCs to be honest.

Anonymous 7368

As much as I have to agree, I can kind of see where they were going with it. They're all supposed to be inverted versions of the mane 6, and most of them are complimentary colors of their respective elements. The only exceptions are Red Velvet, who still acts similar to pinkie pie and therefore, on the surface, isn't really a whole lot different. This kind of corresponds with the whole 'fear' thing, as something cute and innocent on the surface is actually a psychotic monster on the inside. Starlight shadow doesn't fit the color inversion theme either, but I can't really put my finger on why that is.

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Umbra's Review Threat - "Let's Try Again for Like the Nineteenth Time" Edition Umbra!S7TySB6rOM 7355[View]


Well hello there and welcome to /fic/. Why am I welcoming you? I have no idea, considering I've not been active in the MLP fanfiction community for… well, forever, in fandom years.

My name is Umbra, and once upon a time, I raped the souls of authors treading on this blessed ground.

Just kidding, I'm only half that conceited. What I'm really trying to say is that I rather enjoy reading and reviewing, and I've been known to provide decent advice from time to time.

Those of you more familiar with me will also know that I am inconsistent as balls. I will not try to make a secret of the fact that I've been known to start a thread, disappear for months at a time, and generally drop off the map at random for entirely unknown reasons. I won't bore you with those reasons, because they're really no excuse. But I tell you this as a warning: I start review threads during certain periods in my life when I believe I'll have the time, and I do my absolute best to churn out reviews.

VERY CLEAR, however, I WANT TO BE (also Yoda), if you ask me to review something, please post knowing full well that I may never get to your story. I want to help this community because I truly love MLP fanfiction, but I have many other responsibilities in my life. This time I have a few failsafes that I hope will prevent us from reaching a point of implosion, so I'm confident we'll at least be able to keep the thread running for a while, but I can in no way guarantee continuity. That being the case, if you are posting a story in my thread, I have no problem with you posting in other review threads. In fact, so long as the other reviewer is okay with it, I would encourage that. Just make sure we each have a clean document to work on.

Without further ado, here we go with a few rules:
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Stetterson 7358

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'Ello, love. Seems we gots ourselves a fresh new review thread board I take it? Though maybe not too fresh being that you've been around before, or at least so you say.

Anyway, down to the short and gritty. I got something semi-fresh, really short, perhaps a first chapter in something if I feel it good enough. Don't know if it'll be challenge enough to stretch your critical legs, but what have you. No more ados, here ya go:


I'm still tiptoeing on iffy with the title personally, but it's mainly something to get the cobwebs down if ya know what I mean. So have at it, or toss it. Whichever you do, so long as you got something out of it, I'll be fine. Cheers!

(Apologies in advance if this ain't the right format. Couldn't find one in your opener, so I mean no offense)

Review Request 7361

Well, it seems like you have a story on your plate already, but when you get some time I'd appreciate it if you'd take a look at this story. https://docs.google.com/document/d/1wycI-DWjVdzTyYRUPeoRU0bTkEU0apB782I-Nxi-E80/edit

Caramel's Day: Caramel. The most forgetful pony, and the most harmless. But as he goes about the village on his daily chores, the question becomes–who exactly is "Caramel," and why does he have so many lookalikes?

I tried submitting this fic to another reviewer before I realized they'd closed their thread. I may try to submit it to Open Review, if I can figure out how that works… I'm kind of new here, and to writing fics for this fandom in general, really.

Umbra!S7TySB6rOM 7364


Migrating back to Ponychan, my old home. Please copy/paste your requests over there. I'll record your queue position based on the time stamps from this board.

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Synosis Reviews Ion-Sturm 520[View][Last 50 Posts]

#Story Help #Discussion

Please note: this is not a standard review thread. It’s for synopses/descriptions rather than entire fics, and anyone may feel free to chime in. Previous thread at http: http://www.ponychan.net/chan/fic/res/122131.html

The synopsis, while small, is in some ways the most important part of a story. A good one can score you more readers, while a bad one can stop readers in their tracks. So here’s a mini-review thread. Submissions should include a title and tags, in addition to the synopsis.

General advice:

-Proofread. Proofread the buck out of your synopsis. If I see spelling and grammar errors, that doesn’t bode well for the fic proper.
-Keep it relatively short. A paragraph or two, sure, but don’t try to fit a whole chapter in there.
-Don’t try to be fancy. Ellipses, semicolons, em dashes, and suchlike are generally unnecessary in such a short piece.
-Don’t be vague. Don’t be coy. Don’t be mysterious.

That last covers a lot of ground. See, your synopsis is your first chance (and, in many cases, your only chance) to get a reader interested. Don’t hint at something which might maybe be cool and if we start reading we can find it; just go ahead and give us the cool thing. If you’re writing an intentionally vague synopsis and thinking, “Oh, the reader will see me being all mysterious, and they’ll be so desperate to know my secrets,” then you’re wrong. Readers, by and large, do not care that much.

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File: 1378275825937.png (383.02 KB, 1024x683, storysmall.png)

"Bedtime Stories"

Sunshine sunshine ladybugs awake
Clap your hooves and do a little shake
Find a friend who helps you fly
Love will help you touch the sky

Move by moonlight, fires in our wake
Take my hooves and let me feel you shake
I’ll fly home with ashen wings
Join me when the big bell rings

Edit: Agh, I can tell how shitty this is, but I don't know what I should write.
Title is also WIP and a bit shitty.
This post was edited by its author on .


And the short one that I'm much less confident in:

"Sometimes, the truth of a story is more important than the facts."

If this thread is still working... 7362

I'm… having a bit of difficulty with this site, figuring out how to use everything. Regardless, here we go.

Caramel's Day: Caramel. The most forgetful of ponies, a harmless ladies man that goes about Ponyville practically invisibly. But as the day wears on, the question speedily becomes, who exactly is Caramel, and why does he have so many lookalikes?

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Critique & Editing for Full Stories 6726[View]

#Reviewer #Closed Queue: >>6727

Hey, a review thread. Here’s how it works: you submit stuff, and I review it. Pretty simple.


1. A review request must—
(a) include a self-sufficient story and its title, synopsis, and wordcount;
(b) be submitted for either critique or editing; and
(c) be made explicitly in a post with subject “Review Request” (or some variation)
2. If a work is submitted for editing, then the story must be provided as a comment-enabled Google Docs document.
3. I’m not obligated to review anything.

Some clarification:

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This story is marked on Fimfiction as incomplete. If you would read the first post in this thread, I am only interested in stories that are past the first draft stage.

I skimmed through the first chapter and couldn't find any trace of meaningful conflict within it. You've spent all of your precious introductory real estate on character and setting with no consideration for plot, which is a very dangerous thing to do. Conflict is *the* driving factor behind a narrative. The lack of conflict is where this feeling of dryness comes from.

This is compounded by the protagonist being perfectly satisfied with his current situation. It's important that the characters in your story, and most definitely the protagonist, very clearly want *something*. This want is very often the source of conflict, where some other agent stops your protagonist from getting what he/she wants. Without this, creating conflict is difficult. Therein lies your dilemma.

Oppression is a treacherous theme to explore without deep consideration for why it occurs. In most cases, it's opportunism, not hatred. Hatred breeds war, not oppression, and it's usually only resolved when one side is killed. This is why the treatment of earth ponies in this Equestria seems rather strange to me. Why aren't the earth ponies just full blown slaves? Because they're perceived as useless? Why don't the oppressors just kill them, then, if they serve no purpose to the oppressors?

As a writer, it's imperative to understand the motive and emotions of all actors in your story, including the bad guys.

Roger!DodgeR9Q6o 7286

Closing this thread now. Anyone looking for reviews should head over to Ponychan's /fic/.

Review Request Anonymous 7347

I request a critique of a fanfiction that I wrote a while back, it is called Tor Story, this story is from one of the "browser/tech ponies threads from /mlp/ I was one of the original posters of that thread, basically anon's browser from his computer took form based on some fanart he saw, and a somewhat accurate personality

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What Are You Reading? Filler 7179[View]


Alternative title: Let's talk about real books. (But talking about fics is good, too.)

Currently reading:
A Tale for the Time Being by Ruth Ozeki
The Orphan Master's Son by Adam Johnson
Flight Behavior by Barbara Kingsolver
The Men Who Stare at Goats by Jon Ronson
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Anonymous 7274

I'm currently about to start Berliners by James Joyce.
Kind of excited, I never read anything by him.

Anonymous 7317

I lol'd

Anonymous 7352

Currently Reading: Latias' Journey/Brave New World by Ri2, been reading t since April of 2012

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Anonymous 7344[View]

So when will somebody write alterations or complete remakes of the season 4 premiere?

The demand is actually much higher than some would believe.

Anonymous 7345

My only alteration would be to redo the premiere like it was a plant stage from one of the Gradius'.

Heh, imagine someone shouting "Shoot it in the Eye!" at Twilight.

Bleeding Rain!DROPScczL2 7346

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I'm actually shocked at how close those vines were to my idea for a plant I call "Nightmare's Kiss

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Anonymous 7342Locked[View]

This post was edited by a moderator on .

## Mod 7343

Please use the mature content tag if you wish to discuss mature content.

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Anonymous 7335[View]

Do you guys have the formula for writing show-accurate episodes? Specificaly looking for FIM S1 episodes.
Characters, plots, action. The dialogue, subtlety, etc.

Also ideas for where to improve the more lacking aspects of the show, are welcome.

Anonymous 7338

I wonder how successful one would be writing an ep starting from the lesson learned about Friendship, and going from there…

Anonymous 7339

Not much considering the plot never follows the moral, at least not properly.

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