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In the beginning was the Recipe, and the Recipe was with Celestia, and the Recipe was Celestia. It was with Celestia in the beginning. Through it all things were made; without it nothing was made that has been made. In it was life, and that life was the muffin of all ponykind. The muffin bakes in the oven, and the oven has not overcooked it.
There was a mare sent from Celestia whose name was Derpy Hooves. She came as a witness to testify concerning that muffin, so that through her all might believe. She herself was not the muffin; she came only as a witness to the muffin.
The true muffin that gives muffins to everypony was coming into the world. He was in the world, and though the world was made through him, the world did not recognize him. He came to that which was his own, but his own did not receive him. Yet to all who did receive him, to those who believed in his name, he gave the right to become children of Celestia— children born not of natural descent, nor of pony decision or a sire's will, but born of Celestia.